A grandfather typically is interested in enjoying and spoiling his grandkids. He leaves painful things such as confrontation and discipline to the children’s father. And if we are honest with ourselves, we will admit that we tend to want God to be more of a grandfather than a father.
As C. S. Lewis said:
What would really satisfy us would be a God who said of anything we happened to like, “What does it matter so long as they are contented?” We want, in fact, not so much a Father in Heaven as a Grandfather in Heaven — a senile benevolence who, as they say, “liked to see young people enjoying themselves” and whose plan for the universe was simply that it might be truly said at the end of each day, “a good time was had by all”.
It has been said that this present generation is a fatherless generation and suffers greatly from a lack of fathers. And that is very true — tragically true. Many men have abandoned their wives and children and fled from their responsibilities as fathers.
But there is another, less-talked about reason that the father/child relationship in our culture is so dysfunctional. And that reason is that many of us do not really want to be fathered — we want to be grandfathered — and because of this, many have chosen to reject a true, biblical, father/child relationship. And until we embrace ALL the fatherly aspects of God, we will be greatly handicapped — in the spiritual realm as well as in the natural — and suffer from all types of confusion and dissipation that can only be corrected by a firm, loving, wise Father.
“My son, do not despise the LORD’s discipline and do not resent his rebuke, because the LORD disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in.” (Proverbs 3:11-12)
“If you are not disciplined (and everyone undergoes discipline), then you are illegitimate children and not true sons. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.” (Hebrews 12:8,11)
But discipline can be so painful…. :P… No you’re right, I was thinking about this issue the other day and what caused the trend to start in America. I was watching a video that referred to WWII and how many fathers were missing. I don’t have any personal experience with it but I wonder if so many baby boomers growing up with fathers literally absent started or fed a trend in this nation… Just a thought
eddie, i think that is very insightful! and when you add to that the reality that in our culture, we are encouraged to seek slacker-topia (the land of beer and benign grandfathers!), then it is little wonder that we sometimes avoid or resist discipline, even when it is loving and wise.